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Under the Covers with Sleepenvie

IN BED WITH: Dr. Jess

Posted by Nap Queen on June 09, 2017
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Dr. Jess is a sex and relationship expert, keynote speaker, television personality and host of the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. She holds a PhD in human sexuality with a focus on education. Her practical relationship advice reaches millions each month via mainstream media outlets and she travels extensively across the globe to work with couples (including royalty and presidential candidates) to transform their relationships from good to great.
drjess

1. As a sex & relationship expert, author, speaker, councillor and television personality you have already accomplished more than some do in a career and we suspect you are just getting started 😉. What are you most excited about in your career going forward? 

I’m most excited for some of the digital projects we’ll be offering which include video versions of the courses I offer all around the world. No matter how much I travel, there are many who are unable to attend my in-person workshops. So, offering digital versions means we can reach a wider audience — and hopefully help more people to feel comfortable in their skin and confident in their relationships.

 

2. What do you love about your field?

 
Working in this field is a pleasure — obviously :). It is also inherently controversial, however, so it’s always nice when I get notes of appreciation from people who have been positively affected by my work. I got one last week from a podcast listener who says one of my relationship tips translated into a confidence boost which motivated her to ask for and successfully negotiate a raise. It’s amazing how sexual confidence (or lack thereof) permeates into other areas of our lives. 
 

3. In your opinion, how are sex and sleep related? Do you get better sleep after sex? Do you have better sex when you've had a good night's sleep? Can you still have great sex when your exhausted? Or, are the two completely independent and unrelated?

 
We have a wealth of data indicating that a good night’s sleep and a healthy sex life are positively correlated. It just makes sense. When you’re tired, you’re not going to be in the mood for sex. Even if you’re the exception, lack of sleep also leads to relationship strife, which detracts from the likelihood of getting busy. 
 
When you’re well rested, you’re more likely to exercise, eat healthy foods and feel at ease — each of these factors is tied to libido. And sex and sleep go hand in hand, as the rush of hormones after an orgasm helps to lull you into a restful sleep.

 

4. What advice can you give couples that live together and, of course, share a bed to keep the bedroom a sensual space? A lot of us are guilty of watching TV in bed simply because it's so cozy! But, does it ruin romance?

 
No electronics in the bedroom! You can make exceptions (e.g. one of two nights per week), but try to limit them. It’s not just about sensuality or sex — electronic devices detract from presence which is essential to feeing connected and relaxed. If you want to make your partner feel loved and appreciated, the least you can do is put down your phone!
 
And if you use the “my phone is my alarm clock” excuse, I’m not buying it. Put a dollar in a jar each day until you can afford to buy your own adult alarm clock.
 
 

5. As a Toronto native, what are your favourite summertime date night activities to do in the city?

I’m a daytime date person, because our nights tend to be full of social events. 

We live in Corktown, so a walk to Sumach Espresso with my husband and pup is among my favourite simple pastimes. 

We also SUP around the islands and try to catch the sunset at the Island Yacht Club. And if we have an afternoon off, we toss the football or walk the trails surrounding the Evergreen Brickworks. Toronto has a decent network of walking trails where you’ll stumble upon hidden creeks, sunning turtles and even cottontail rabbits!

6. Let's talk aphrodisiacs: what are your favourite sexy snacks?

Grapes. In the form of red wine.

I also love oysters, which are high in zinc and cherries which are apparently good for your sleep. 
 
 

7. With work, travel, and balancing a social life, sleep can be a challenge. What is your secret to sweet dreams?

I’m not a great sleeper. I need you to teach me! I change time zones 3-4 times per month and I love both late nights and early mornings! Can you help me? 

 
I have some amateur tips for changing time zones, but, sometimes, I don’t practice what I preach:
 
  • Set your watch to your upcoming timezone as soon as you board the plane to trick yourself forward/backward

  • Sleep on planes! I find it easy to sleep on planes, so I ask the flight attendants to wake me (they usually give you a little sticker to indicate if you want to be woken) at strategic times. For example, if I’m flying home from Europe in the afternoon, I’ll take a very short nap and ask them to wake me up so that I’ll go to sleep when I return home to Toronto.

  • If you’re heading east, set your alarm 30 minutes earlier each day for a few days before you leave. I don’t know if this is good advice from a scientific perspective, but it works for me :).

 
If you love Dr. Jess as much as we do, check out www.sexwithdrjess.com for links to her latest youtube videos, information on her awesome webinars and books, as well as tips, tricks and advice.

ABOUT SLEEPENVIE

Sleepenvie is a Canadian online mattress-in-a-box and bedroom lifestyle brand that focuses on customization, convenience, and charitable contribution.

We make the mattress-buying process easy by delivering it directly to your door in one easy-to-handle compact box. We strongly believe in customizability, rather than a one-size-fits-all approach. An easy one-minute quiz matches you to the ideal mattress for your lifestyle and sleep habits.

Check us out online at www.sleepenvie.com and on Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest at @Sleepenvie. Sweet dreams!

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